Life

Hello- i am bound and determined to get this posted.  its long- grab a drink and put your feet up.  and i hope you enjoy!  we are starting at claysen's birthday....

here he is- the birthday boy.

all he wanted to do was to go to Chilies.  for the past 2 years, jelly bean was able to go because of a football game one year, and then we were coming home from ut the next time.  so it worked out that i was feeling near death with the pregnancy- so it made things easier for me.  2 birds with one stone!

look how happy he is!  isnt he so hansom?  he is so sweet.  about this time in the pregnancy he would come and take naps with me.  because 'snuggling makes people feel better'  that is what he told me.  he would then come and snuggle.  and it did make me feel much better.  =)

he thought this was the coolest cake ever.  it has chocolate, syrup, and ice cream!  what is better then that look of happiness and excitement.  after about 3 bites, it was more then he could handle.  but it was so worth it.  the next day he looked at me and said, that it was his greatest birthday ever.  i am just glad that it made him happy.  thats all that really matters.

while his aunt cait was here, they bonded.  he  LOVES her.  they talk about dinosaurs and transformer together.  how cool is that?

this was a moment of focus to unwrap.  can you see the anticipation on his face?  lol it was so fun to watch.

jerra made this card for him.  how cute is that.  i believe that it is a picture of her and him playing with his new transformers and dinosaurs, because he loves her.

mom made him an apron.  he could wait to put it on and cook.  and we had a subject more then happy and willing to obliged in taking care of the results.

during the pregnancy, i couldnt really do anything.  anything but sit and NOT have a baby. and that was what i did.  i fed the kids and i did not have a baby.  and that was sad for me. so i started looking at the blogs. and i got addicted  i was bitten by the craft bug.  hard.  and now i cant stop.  i will be posting some of the new things that i have been working on soon..... when they are finished that is....

so here is the all fantastic pregnant belly.  this was taken 1 week prior to delivery.  ginormous isnt it?

this was another one of my projects i actually finished these the day i delivered.  april is not near valentines day, i realize that.  but it was harder then normal for me to get all the supplies.  i saw these types of things all over the place.  so i cant really just link you up to one, start at one of the above and just look around.  you will see bunches of them.

now that i have had baby z.  i feel like myself.  exhausted beyond the ability of words.  its hard.  4 is hard.  those who say its all the same after 3, havent told me the secret.  because its not the same.  its more, in every way possible.  but at the same time, its so worth it.  i look down and see this, how can i not be happy?  the look of ecstasy, and pure joy, its amazing.  but also- if you look closely you can see something in his right hand.  can you see what it is?  its a shoe.  he loves them, because that means we are going somewhere and that means we get to go outside.  and he LOVES it outside.  too bad its now like 95 degrees already.  i love the expression though.  doesnt it make you happy to see?  it does me! 

back to before baby z.  some if the sweet friends in my ward.  this picture was taken during a contraction, about 1 hour before delivery....

here is joe and me the morning after i had z.  you notice my splotchy red face?  that is because i look like i have the measles close up, all the blood vessels in my face were popped cuz i pushed a baby out.  =)

here we are again, this time with z.....

here is the happiest big brother.  he is such a good brother.  he loves to hold z and talk to him.  but i have to say monkey is a great big brother, no pictures yet of that one, hard to work that one out, monkey just loves him so much.  when he sees him- his face lights up and he cooes at him.  now when z is sleeping, he will wonder around the house saying 'shhhh' with his little finger over his mouth telling everyone to 'shhhhhh'.  i love it.

here is jelly bean.  she is still a good big sister.  she loves to help and hold him.   we have been so blessed to have kids that absolutely LOVE each other.  they love to help one another, and play together.  they are good.  when i hear them playing together, the big ones tickling the big baby, i melt.  i start to cry.  there has been such a sweet spirit since we have all be a complete family.  having that knowledge is comforting. i just cant wait to get our updated family pictures!  get your hiney down here diana!!!  jk- well only kinda, i still want ya down here.....  =)

here we are at Easter.... i have to say that i think that it was really kinda sad this year.  not quite what i was planning,but give me credit- i just had a baby!  Usually in our house, the Easter bunny comes on saturday that way, on sunday we can better focus on the real meaning of Easter.  but this year, the Easter bunny left a note saying that since 'mommy and baby z just got home, that he would wait and come on sunday'.  that was kinda nice, and my wonderful MIL made a fabulous Easter lunch and then left us all the left overs so we would for surely have food!  it was so good!  anyway- to keep things easy on mom and dad this year, the Easter bunny  hid all the eggs inside this year instead of outside.  so here is the picture i can find of the big kids coming down the stairs.....

and here is daddy and 'big baby' waiting.  i think they had a lot of fun!  we only ate the candy for like 63 days!  =) i cant wait for next year so i can make up for this year.  they still liked it.  they told me so, but i still was wishing i had done more.  i think the sweetest part was when they had a "meeting" before scripture study that night, and jellybean and chunky told us the story of the Resurrection and why its important.  and i think that is far more important then having a huge celebration with tons of gifts and candy.  and seeing them help monkey find his eggs and then seeing each of them share an egg with z was so sweet!  all in all i think it was a good Easter.

so here is a random picture of my sleep deprived self and my angel.

and the happiest monkey in the world- its blurry i know, but i still thought it was rather cute of him.....

and i love how z is sleeping here.  when hes not swaddled, this is how he likes to lay.  he just reclines and enjoys life.  he really does have me wrapped around his finger..... such a sweet adorable baby!

here is one with jerra having a quiet moment with z.  how precious is that to see her so gently love her brother.  i think if she could do that for an hour she would, she is always asking to hold him and always giving him kisses!  he is never lacking in the love department that is for sure!  he has 5 residential people of all sizes that love to snuggle and hug him!

here is 1 picture of when momma came and helped. i have more that i need to load on still, but i am trying to find the time to finish this post!( i am going on 2 nights of typing.....) but all i can say, is she SAVED me!  she couldnt have come at a better time, not only was i hitting that exhaustion wall, but joseph ended up having to go out of town!  so mom, THANK YOU!!!!!!  we made freezer meal and slightly caught me up on things around the house.  more importantly we got to see her and my kids got to play with 'their grams'.  LOVED IT!!!

now that i have had baby z. i feel like myself. exhausted beyond the ability of words. its hard. 4 is hard. those who say its all the same after 3, havent told me the secret. because its not the same. its more, in every way possible. but at the same time, its so worth it. i look down and see this, how can i not be happy?  never in my life have i been more exhausted, stressed, busy, frazzled, or overwhelmed in my life.  but at the same time, i have never been more content, happy, joyful, fulfilled, satisfied or excited about my life.  i know this is where i am supposed to be, doing what i am supposed to do, and with who i am supposed to be with.  i love at the faces of my babies and my best friend, and know that i am happy and that no matter what, with the knowledge that i can have an Eternal Family, i know that we, together, can overcome anything.  with my joe and my family and with my Heavenly Fathers help- even though there are days where in am convinced i cant get anything but feeding the kids done, somehow with His faith in me and joseph faith in me, somehow i manage to get laundry done, the bathrooms cleaned and dinner on the table!  how can i not count myself as lucky?!? 

anyway- i am busy, i am getting things that i want and need to be done, done.  and i am happy with that.  my house isn't perfect, i feel like it smells like diaper and pets (although i have had many people say it doesn't), i rarely have a conversation that isn't interrupted by a child, and i have a single course meal.  but i am happy, my kids are happy.  and i am trying to focus on that, not my floors.  =)  taken me awhile to get used to the idea that that ( ^^^) is ok- but i now know that it is ok, i just like to have certain things done so many times and in so many ways, but life is good......

how can you say otherwise?........

night!